Are you a time optimist? Here’s what to do about it.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve been slightly late to things. Never majorly late – never so late that I’d miss a flight or exam, for example. But as a teenager, I’d be a few minutes late every single day to school. And despite each night insisting to myself that tomorrow would be different, it never was – and this problem with punctuality continued into adulthood.
I’d wonder why I had a problem with timekeeping, but never gave it serious thought. After all, being late never affected my life that much. I never missed a Very Important Event – but I couldn’t say I was ever exactly on time, either. I’d always turn up at the very last moment, sweaty, rushing and stressed. So why did I continue to do it?
Enter time optimism. When I came across this piece in The Guardian last year from journalist Anita Chaudhuri, I felt all my questions had been answered. I was a time optimist!
As Chaudhuri explains, the term was coined by Swedish clinical psychologist Michaela Thomas. “A tidsoptimist is a person who underestimates how long something takes, and also overestimates how much time they have at their disposal,” said Thomas. “So they will often be late for appointments, or rush things at the last minute, and this can create stress for themselves and others.”
The reason I resonated with the term so much was that it got to the core of why I was always late — I felt I could do more with the time at hand than I could in reality. If I was going to catch a train, and found myself ready to leave the house 5 minutes early, I’d do a ‘quick’ chore to fill the time, like stacking the dishwasher. Inevitably, this would take longer than I’d anticipated, and I’d miss my train.
The good news is, after finding out about time optimism, I went down a Google rabbit hole of advice, and found a few techniques that work for me (although it’s definitely still a work in progress!). Setting timers has been a gamechanger. On top of setting an alarm for the time I need to leave, I’ll set regular 10-minute timers leading up to it. This stops me from falling into the trap of thinking I have more time than I do to get any extra tasks done – instead, I can just focus on getting out the house.
I’ve also started reminding myself that being early isn’t that bad. I finally figured out that part of my lateness is a dislike of being early and having “extra time” – and this is especially true if I’m headed to an anxiety-inducing event like an exam. There’s loads of advice out there for being more punctual – this is a great place to start. And an important disclaimer: if you’re concerned about timekeeping, or if being late impacts your life in a big way, it may be worth seeking some professional support.
If you also struggle with being on time, I hope these tips help – I’d love to hear yours!